Japanese writer Haruki Murakami once shared, “Every one of us is losing something precious to us: Lost opportunities, lost possibilities, feelings we can never get back again. That’s part of what it means to be alive.”
I recently lost someone very dear to me. Her death was both tragic and completely unexpected – a suicide, snatching her from the unfathomable depths of her own depression.
And, as I sit here typing this – I’m overwhelmed by one prevailing thought. That, in spite of how much she was loved – she still died alone.
People like to say things following a suicide. Things such as, “I never thought someone like her…”
But, when 1 in 10 people around the world suffer the demons of depression – it’s time that we set aside the stigma, and open our hearts to discussion.
The Buddha taught that we should continuously strive to cultivate the energy of self-care. But, for those who have ever suffered through the heaviness of depression – you know, that self-care is often the very last thing you wish to do.
Why, even the most well-seasoned of practitioners can still struggle just like everyone else.
This morning, I am struggling, my darlings. I’m struggling with a loss that is far greater than any I’ve ever known. What words might I have shared? What actions might I have taken?
Could I have changed the course of this one desperately solitary life?
Someone shared with me this week that we shouldn’t live in the space of hindsight. And, to that end – I must move forward. To take from this experience, that one, most precious gift – and offer it through to the heart of another.
My darlings, for any one of you who has suffered in this way – I am here to say, that you are not ever alone. We can’t take everything to the meditation cushion, my loves. Some things require the kindness of another person’s heart to help us find our way through.
And, I am here to help you find your way through. Whether by phone, or email, or message left here – I promise, always, a kind ear.
We all suffer, my loves. And, for some – this suffering can seem unbearable.
“Be gentle with yourself,” reminds author Max Ehrmann. “You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars.”
A message not ever to be forgotten – even in those moments we may feel that life has swallowed us whole.
You are never without this connection, my darlings – from my humble heart to yours.
In peace… namaste.
