Buddhism

The Jewel of Our Human Soul.

There’s a Buddhist story I quite like. I’d heard it first as a much younger girl, though didn’t realize its value until much later on.

The story is about a young man born to wealthy parents. He had everything he could ever want, hope or wish for – a beautiful home, the finest of clothes, and delicacies within every morsel.

And yet, he was always unhappy.

His parents worked harder to provide for their child. Day by day they suffered the toils of their son’s unsettled heart. Until one day, unable to give any more – they died.

But, they’d left for their child one final gift – a beautiful gemstone wrapped in a silken cloth. “It’s here when you need it,” the hand-written note said. “Remember, to draw upon when needed.”

Within just a few years, the man had exhausted the last their wealth – and, now penniless was cast to the streets.

Homeless and desperately hungry, he fell to his knees – as the silk-wrapped jewel fell from his pocket.

“Tell me, why are you suffering?” As he looked up, he saw a monk smiling in crimson robe. “When all that you could ever want or need – was always just right here waiting for you?”

The ‘jewel’, of course, is intended to speak to our inner spirit, and everything which has helped to shape our human experience. In any given moment, we can draw upon the attributes forged through these years – love, happiness, resilience, hope – it’s all right there, isn’t it?

And offering us this gentle reminder, “we are never alone if we have lived.”

Everything you ‘need’, my darlings, is right there within – stop being so hesitant to call upon it.

These Words Which Carry Us Through.

I had piles of bills stacked on my table – to the left a breakdown of the charges “not covered” under standard health care insurance.

I thought of my children, first – what would they do? How might they cope? Perhaps, more selfishly, I though of myself – how would the diagnosis of a progressive degenerative neurological disease change my capacity to ‘be.’

I thought of all those ‘worst case scenarios’ as we often do when life overwhelms. But, there is always a settling in, my dears – a moment when the veil of uncertainty lifts.

Thankfully, I stumbled upon a quote from Buddhist philosopher Daisaku Ikeda. “It is senseless,” he writes “to blame others or your environment for your miseries. Change begins from the moment you muster the courage to act. When you change, the environment will change. The power to change the world is found nowhere but within our own life.”

It was in that moment that I realized, I had everything I needed to feel present again in my life.

It was as if a great burden had been lifted. There were no decisions to be made, nor circumstances to overcome. It was all right here nestled within the ‘now.’

It’s easy to feel overwhelmed, my loves. Easier still to feel small in the face of life’s larger challenges. But, we make the mistake in thinking ‘these changes are all wrong.’ When, in reality, change often ushers the ‘best that has yet to come.’

And, courage comes by way of willingness – the willingness to embrace all possible outcomes.

Had I resisted this life change, I couldn’t be ‘here’ – sharing my heart completely each day to a growing community of beautiful souls. Had I resisted I might never have learned – that true grace comes by way of mustering our courage.

And though my health issues present a unique sort of challenge, it is precisely this path that brings me closer to you each day.

For that, I am ever-grateful my friends — and, for those many millions of micro-moments that continue to bring us here.

Namaste, my loves – ❤️

A Lesson in Lillies.

Oh, my darlings – just look what the garden left for me today.

A stargazer wrapped in fullest bloom, bowing humbly before the hope of a brand new day.

“She cast her fragrance and her radiance over me,” writes Antoine de Saint-Exupery. “I ought never to have run away.”

Written in 1943, the story of The Little Prince is still relevant today – and its message, a divinely beautiful one.

That is to say, that the emotions stemming from our innermost conflict – unsettledness, doubt, fear – are alleviated through our interconnectedness.

The story was written in the shadows of war; and was the means by which Saint-Exupery offered peace.

“It is only with the heart that one can see rightly,” he explains. “What is essential is invisible to the eye.”

My goodness, imagine all that from the unfurled petals of this stargazer lilly.

❤

Our One True Self.

I remember watching a television show not too long ago. A young woman, adopted as an infant, was desperately seeking the identity of her birth mother.

“If only I could know who she was,” she said. “Maybe then I could finally feel whole.”

I’ve often pondered this notion of ‘wholeness’. From a Buddhist perspective, we’re taught that wholeness is attained by way of a return to our ‘one true self’. And, forged by way of an unconditional gratitude.

“The earth is neither great nor a grain of sand small,” shares Zen master, Shunryu Suzuki. “In the realm of Great Activity picking up a grain of sand is the same as taking up the whole universe.”

Indeed, to see this world without the identifier of ‘label’, is to finally understand the true depth of our interconnectedness.

In this way, we are not ever alone.

And,

In this way, we are not ever without.

 

Finding Purpose and Giving Our Whole Heart to It.

I’ve been feeling just a wee bit self-conscious lately. My hand tremors have become somewhat more prominent, you see. And with that, my mind has become far more self aware.

From a very young age, I was taught that a woman’s hands should be fluent, elegant and refined. Though, as I sit here watching them tremble – I wonder if grace might ever find its place amongst these fingertips again.

Facing a life-altering diagnosis isn’t easy. Though, finding our place within change is much harder still.

But, life is full of glorious changes. In an instant, our lives may be transformed – for better, for worse.

That’s part of the adventure, now isn’t it? Oh, that we might learn to become fearless explorers, undaunted by the path ahead.

Oliver Sacks once wrote of a sudden clarity he felt upon learning of his terminal cancer diagnosis—as if a tremendous burden had been lifted, and his soul’s ‘one true purpose’ restored. He spoke of the intensity he now felt in just simply being alive, knowing he alone was responsible for the wholeness of his being.

“It is up to me now to choose,” he wrote “how to live out the months that remain to me. I have to live in the richest, deepest, most productive way I can.”

My darlings, every day, I am reminded of this miracle of being alive. From my window, I watch as the trees bow humbly to the breeze. Immediately, I am filled with the same depth of gratitude.

Though, why must we be content to wait? Should not each day impose a similar sense of glory? And, why must purpose be motivated by cause?

Indeed, it is up to us to choose. Whether to live a life of unbridled magnitude – of courage, of faith, of optimism, of belief…

Or, to simply settle in to a routine which carries us further away…

How sad that we often lose sight of purpose – as we tumble forward into the dialogue of ‘what happens next.’

We forget that without purpose our lives would have no meaning.

We forget to allow meaning into our day.

Oh, but that we might, as the Buddha suggested, find our purpose in this life, and then… give our whole heart and soul to it.

A Heart Worth Discovering.

My first connection to stillness came by way of an unexpected diagnosis.

“I think you have Parkinson’s,” he said as he placed his hand gently over mine. In that moment, all thought was suspended. Pema Chodron describes it as the ‘gap’.

“In any given moment,” she reminds. “you could just listen. In any moment, you could put your full attention on the immediacy of your experience.”

In that moment, I set aside all barriers to being, and instead just simply listened.

For the first time, I actually heard the stillness. They say, the quieting of mind is the most powerful meditation. In the laying down of these internal barriers, we are finally able to experience the fullness of this life.

“Only when the ocean is calm,” shares Thich Nhat Hanh, “can we see the moon reflected in it.”

Living from a space of silence is often misunderstood. Rather than clearing those external distractions, we should learn to remain ‘undisturbed’ by them.

And whereas, Parkinson’s may have slowed my pace, it has accelerated this path to mindfulness.

In every challenge, my darlings – there is a gift.

“What you need, what we all need,” he writes “is silence. Stop the noise in your mind in order for the wondrous sounds of your heart to be heard.”

And so, on this day, my darlings – I’m wishing you the blessing of silence. That we may someday know the grace of a heart worth discovering.

Namaste ~

 

A Little Something About Breaking That Jar.

There’s a Zen parable about an old man and a swan; a bird so lovely, he placed it within a glass jar upon the highest shelf, and for all the world to see.

The old man cared dearly for the swan; sharing each day, these lessons of life and of love. And, in order that she may one day know the true joy of her own existence.

But, as the swan grew, she soon became too large for the glass jar. Desperate to keep things just as they were, the old man held her there – fearful that the loveliness of his swan might soon be lost. Though, sadly, what he failed to realize was that – who and what we love eventually grows.

Particularly, when tended with such loving-kindness and care.

Because, my darlings, true love can never be contained; like a wildflower it blooms even against the heaviest of rains.

In the end, the only way to truly ‘save’ her was to find courage enough  to shatter that ‘jar.’

It’s often with good intention that we set out to protect that which we love most of all. But, in doing so – aren’t we inadvertently sealing their hearts from the rest of this world?

Though, more tragically, is when we attempt to shield our own in much the same way. As Dr. Rachel Remen once so poignantly asked,

“Is it possible to live so defensively that you never get to live at all?”

Much like the old man, we place our hearts upon the highest shelf, never once realizing that…like the baby swan – it, too, will soon outgrow the limitations of this space.

“We begin to survive at the cost of thriving,” offers author, Mark Nepo, “we exist at the cost of living and give into resignation instead of seeking joy again.”

Until we finally ask ourselves: “do we risk all that we have, in order to live fully once again?”

Which Do You Choose?

My darlings, in this life – we’ve an opportunity.

A cascading of moments, really – each glorious in their own right and recognition, and with the purpose of either improving our world or making it worse.

And, that choice is always ours – now, isn’t it?

Whether we are consciously aware, or not – trust that one will inevitably claim its space. Yet, oftentimes – we fail to appreciate, just how much impact we have on the lives of others.

“Life is similar to a bus ride,” shares author, Chirag Tulsiani. “The journey begins when we board the bus. We meet people along our way of which some are strangers, some friends and some strangers yet to be friends. There are stops at intervals and people board in. At times some of these people make their presence felt, leave an impact through their grace and beauty on us fellow passengers – while on other occasions they remain indifferent.”

Indeed, some may come into our lives – and we are forever changed. Others, are simply passersby along the way.

And, the only difference between the two, my darlings – resides within our willingness to connect.

Still, though science and medicine have proven our physical relationships – we struggle to find the heart of our kinship. And, in that struggle we simply pull away.

Pulling away is much easier, don’t you think? To observe versus to engage.

But, what is the cost of this really?

In walking away, we lose touch with the promise of humanity. We lose touch with the better part of being human.

We have a choice to make, my darlings – we can choose to make this world a better place, or continue on, undisturbed.

And, so my question for you on this day, my loves is:

Which of these two do you choose?

This Most Precious Today.

“My actions are the ground on which I stand,” shares American Zen Buddhist, Joan Halifax.

As abbot and guiding teacher of Upaya Zen Center in Santa Fe, New Mexico, she has become a pioneer in the field of end-of-life care.

“In being with dying,” she writes. “we arrive at a natural crucible of what it means to love and be loved. And we can ask ourselves this: Knowing that death is inevitable, what is most precious today?”

And, so I ask of you, my darlings – what is most precious for you today?

For me, it is that I am sitting right here enjoying the company of dear friends. While in my hands, there’s a ceramic mug gifted from someone dear.

That I’ve a roof over my head, and food to eat. And, that perhaps because of something I’ve done – another’s heart may have been lifted.

That, in this moment and in spite of my illness, I am still able to smile…to breathe…to laugh… to share.

To offer this gracious energy of hope tucked humbly within these few words.

And, knowing that:

“Now more than ever you can be
generous toward each day
that comes, young, to disappear
forever, and yet remain
unaging in the mind.
Every day you have less reason
not to give yourself away.” ~ Wendell Berry

Don’t let it all disappear, my loves – live now, live fully, live for this most precious today.

<3

The Roots Within the Reflection.

What does it mean to be truly open – and, what just keeps us from being ‘there’?

In this mirror we see only a faint shadow of our reflection – deep lines forming where worry once tread. Our eyes are drawn to the space of criticism, whilst the finer nuances of our beauty are left undetected.

Though, more often than not, we tend to stop right there. We go no further, turning away from our weakness – and, in doing so we leave yet another lesson ‘on the table.’

That is to say, in looking for the truth within this criticism – we begin to form the roots of our own humility.

And, when we are humbled – we are most willing and open to learn. In fact, criticism can open us to new horizons – help us to further examine that which we’ve long held to be true. It can shake the very foundation upon which we stand, and help us discover a new perspective.

And, when you look at it in this way, my loves – I guess criticism isn’t quite so bad. When we’re able to move past, that is – and further into the depths of self-examination.

In this way, perhaps this label of criticism – might be better served by understanding the power within this action of reflection?

Something to consider, don’t you think? And, a little nudge to help us remember.

Much love, my dearest friends – and, on this day I bow to you. <3