I remember the first time he hit me; it was an unexpected sharp blow from behind. A ‘sucker punch’, as my father would have said. And I was a fool for allowing it in my life.

Like so many others, I mistook his attention. I was terrified by the prospect of an unmitigated emptiness, hoping desperately that his presence might help to relieve. Though as time passed, his actions worsened and I found myself living in a constant state of fear.

As humans, we strive to connect. We desperately need to coexist with another – as if it were a measure of our own self worth. We become so invested in our ‘others’ opinion, that we fail to take stock of our own.

How well have we lived, and how have we loved? More importantly, what treasures have we left behind?

It took many, long years for me to finally understand that this void I had experienced was mine alone to fill.

We can not seek wholeness through the company of others. Rather, we must first be whole in order to share. In leaving him, I was able to return faith to a space where it was sorely needed.

In peace, my sweet friends…

Namaste ❣️